Ok, so Beth thinks I am going to scare off my readers with my philosophical/existential angst about my life.  A couple of things I need to remind my readers of:

1. First and foremost, this blog is about ME.  No one else.  ME.

2. Readers? Plural?  Are there that many of you?  Ok, so if it’s more than 2, which I know, I guess I do have readers. Yeah, although, I think there is actually 4 steady readers, who actually wonder/tell me to update my blog.  Beth, Sarah, K, and Cousin Dan and family (I count them as one).  Ok, 5 if you count me, since I am kind of reading as I write.  he he he

3. Did I mention this blog is about ME?  ha ha ha

4. This is a diary/journal (i guess depending on age and gender) of my life while I am out of the country.  Taking that winding path to who knows where.

This is why I did the blog instead of email, besides efficiency.  If I do not know you are reading, then it’s ok and no feelings are hurt.  If you are reading constantly and do not make comments, that’s ok too.  I don’t mind.  This blog is not for me to attract friends.  If I make new friends out of this, then bonus.  If not, I do not lose anything.

Beth, your poem you pointed out, success is whatever one makes of it.  Whatever accomplishments I have achieved or lives I have touched.  Maybe someone out there is going through a similar angst and feels better for reading my blog.  If so, great, if not, oh well.  For some, they may not have the friends and family support I have.  Each and every one has contributed to how I feel, whether I should stay low key or get revved up. {Wiping the tears off my face as I type :) }

I also see this as something cathartic about writing all this down and expressing my feelings.  You know my family has never been the touchy feely type.  Do you remember how long it took me to initiate the hug in the Z family? Or tense up when I see the family hugs coming?

Anyways . . . I think I am over my need to continue with my emotional roller coaster.  Don’t get me wrong, I am far from my goal/passion in life; but I do not feel so bad about it any more.  Through the last couple of weeks, I did not feel the need to have a drink or do something outrageous, like go the store without a shopping list!  How pathetic is that?

Well, I at least always have chocolate at my place. 

SideNote: Gordon Ramsey runs the London marathon.  I think he has participated for the last 7 or 8 years.  How interesting.  The 2009 London Marathon’s lottery is closed already.  Wow, can you believe you have to register about a year in advance?  I saw some of the results, the top runner finished in a little over 2 hours.

Anyways, I leave you tonight with this:

A bear and rabbit is pooping in the woods.  You know the rest, I love that joke, always makes me smile.